Everything Changes, Nothing Changes
Its been 12 months since my last contact. Let me share what has happened.
I recently had one of those experiences where everything changed but nothing had changed. I mean nothing outwardly had changed but inwardly everything had changed. I was seeing things differently. My perspective had altered.
I had been unmotivated and feeling stuck, my days were being stolen by time bandits such as mindless TV watching, Candycrushing, day dreaming and generally phaffing around. They were aimless, time wasting habits, that I felt guilty about but kept doing anyway. I was sick of myself, making lists of tasks I knew I had to complete and I did, but the angst I put myself through before had left me with no feeling of achievement. The internal negative self talk was increasing my frustration and feelings of uncertainty.
Then a weekend workshop that I had wanted to go to but couldn't because of clashing diary dates suddenly shifted to date that was open on my calendar. I booked and went.
It was EFT 3 - a 3 day workshop with Bennie Naude, whose workshops I had attended before. Bennie is a wonderful generous trainer and facilitator and I can highly recommend his workshops.
I returned from this weekend feeling fundamentally changed. I was suddenly full of ideas, motivated and more importantly productive.
What exactly had changed?
While I was pondering this seemingly miraculous change to my mindset, I realised I had been in a rut for 12 months. Last September our beloved dog, Nova, had to be put down unexpectedly. It was the day before I was to be facilitating a weekend Self-care Retreat. I was devastated. Nova had been such a joy. We got her when she was 6 weeks old and she had the most loving and infectious personality, and such a sense of humour. She was incredibly smart and playful, loyal and loving. She developed a heart condition and we had no choice but to help her finish her life. I held her in my arms at the vet, feeling like I was betraying her as he put her to sleep.
The family were grief stricken and our other dog, Jelly, was pining.
I still miss her every day but I am incredibly thankful for having such a wonderful pet.
Then, just after Christmas, my computer shit itself. I lost almost everything, photos, videos, all my work, including workshops I had written, resources, personal letters. What I had left was hundreds of thousands of numbered files, that were parts of complete files. I was devastated. I got some empathy but I also got feedback like
“Well you should have backed it up”
Thank you Captain Obvious.
I was now grieving about my dog, and having to start over with all my work and I was full of self-doubt and despair.
Maybe this was sign from the Universe I wasn't on track.
Ok, so if that wasn't it, then what was. I slumped into a daily routine, stopped making good decisions and dreamed constantly about overseas travel. Then this workshop came up.
So what changed? My perspective. Everything else was the same.
How did it change?
At the course we were learning about Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping) which I use personally and professionally with great results. I know it works, but I wasn't using it on my situation. Partly because, I couldn't see clearly when I was in the middle of it and partly because we often don't do the things we should in order to help ourselves. I was hoping something else would change and then I wouldn't have to. (Sound familiar?)
Learning tapping on issues such as deservability, anger, forgiveness, money, self-doubt etc for ourselves and for others (borrowing benefits) something shifted. I was back!! (and I hadn't known I'd left) If you can relate to any of this and want to empower yourself by learning EFT (Tapping) there will be a workshop early next year. If you want some private sessions with me please contact me.